the end..

it was great
happy moments
sad times
encouragement
arguing
love
disgust
anger
passion
deep feelings
a little resentment
but all love in the end...

that sums up what we were and it was a great ride....i'll never forget it on [you]
the things we went through cant be duplicated in any way and will forever hold a special place in my heart. sorry i wasnt ready for all you could be but i had to be honest and do what was best for me...i'll always be here

productivity

it's about that time to end on a STRONG note. these classes dont appear to be "difficult" per say but they do pose a few issues. I hope that in these last 20 odd days of class i don't mess up what i built first semester and finish with anything less than a 3.85 for the year. If I do that then I will definitely be on my way to a spot in PBK [Phi Beta Kappa]

a few idle thoughts

1. this semester has been CRAZY
2. other than my goonz in Graves, i dont bang with a lot of my bros =/
3. UNC better win tonight
4. time has flown by...remember when the strip was "poppin"
5. big byrd and purris' blogs keep me entertained
6. i need to get these grades right
7. anybody else excited for the probates????
8. can people please stop making paragraph facebook statuses??? just becuz you can doesn't mean you should
9.naps = <3
10. i cant stop loving Elena Estelle Washington...i feel mad dumb in love...BUT OH WELL [11.16]

convo with amber

read an enjoy this wonderful facebook chat convo with my girl amber b shelley, lol

3:48amCharlie
ooo..but what does ur tat say??


3:48am
Amber
La famille est un havre dans un monde sans coeur...family is a haven in a heartless world

3:49am
Charlie
oooo...nice
but BOOOOO french

3:49amAmber
lol why? i love french

3:50amCharlie
french sucks
spanish is the ish

3:51amAmber
oh whatever! french is better than Spanish anyday

3:51amCharlie
keep that bs on your campus

3:51amAmber
at least we can speak french in ANY francophone and still be understood

3:52amCharlie
what is a francophone??

3:52amAmber
french speaking country

3:53amCharlie
its only like 8 in the world

3:54amAmber
Africa is more than eight itself
then there luxembourg
and France
and other places i can't remember
don't be a hater

3:54amCharlie
ok...well we have a whole continent
fla, ttx*, cali
and the caribbean
oh, and spain
:P

3:55amAmber
haiti is french too!
so the carribean doesn't count
HA!

3:55amCharlie
watev

3:55amAmber
lousiana too

3:55amCharlie
well throw in new mexico

3:56amAmber
yours don't all speak the same spanish though
mine all speak the same french
well except for lousiana...they on some other shit

3:57amCharlie
nobody speaks the "same" of any language
everyone has their own dialect

3:58amAmber

Charlie, don't be gettin all technical with me

you know what i mean

all of our words mean the same

in every country

3:58amCharlie

and ours dont???

3:58amAmber

hecks no!!

3:58amCharlie

ok....

3:59amAmber

certain words in mexican spanish can mean something totally different in the dominican republic

ask alex...she told me that

4:00amCharlie

YOU WIN DARNIT

gosh!

women always gotta be right

gotta have the last word

UGH

4:00amAmber

ha ha ha

i'm glad you learned this now

life will be a lot easier for you

4:01amCharlie

amen

your species is ridiculous

4:02amAmber

lol well, we're so simple it's complicated

4:02amCharlie

bull SHIT

4:03amAmber

ha ha how so?

4:04amCharlie

nothing is simple about females

you all make life soo frikkin complicated

when its supposed to be simple

4:04amAmber

lol i make things quite simple

give me my attention and don't lie

isn't that simple?

4:05amCharlie

yeah

but many others

: cough cough: alex

dont

lol

4:06amAmber

lol damn...but you're right

4:06amCharlie

thank you

4:06amAmber

most girls are a lot more immature than they want to believe

4:06amCharlie

PREACH!

4:06amAmber

ha ha i'm just bein real...

it's funny how girls like to talk about being on they "grown woman" but still play little girl games

then try to act like they don't know what's goin on when they get called out on it or the realtionship suffers from it

4:07amCharlie

can i put this on my blog???

ppl need this wisdom

lol

4:08amAmber

lol you can if you'd like

i think i should write more notes

4:08amCharlie

you definitely should

and i definitely am

time with the fam

i really enjoyed spending a beautiful saturday with the fam traveling to birmingham, alabama. we went to visit the birmingham civil rights institute [don't call it a museum, lol] and the history there overwhelmed me. it was a privilege to be in a place with such a historic past and a place where greats like dr fred shuttlesworth, dr martin luther king and rev ralph abernathy helped to make changes that i personally benefit from today. spending time with my grandmother, baby sister and mom is always a treat of some of the laughs and talks we shared I will always remember. :-D

refreshed

sometimes it takes a night alone...
a convo at 2 am in the cold of an atlanta night
to figure out what is right; for you, for her.
because of this i now feel refreshed,
replenished, and ready
for all that life has to offer
for me and her. i know we can do it
and only me or her can stop it

11/16/08 - until.....

sleeping DISorder

where to begin?? the past 3 nights [well, mornings] including this one I have not stayed asleep for more than 4 hours. That means going to bed by 2 and being up by 6. It is something that truly scares me because I've never had sleeping problems before and I think it's a clear sign that this college lifestyle has officially taken its toll on me. Although in high school I was never one who need 7-9 hours of sleep [usually slept by 1 and was up by 6] at least is was a consistent 5-6 hours. I should have noticed something was wrong when I went home for breaks and could never get more than 6 hours of sleep even if I had nothing to do the next day and didn't set an alarm. I don't know what to do now and the only possible solution i can imagine is to stop taking naps [which i've done since soph yr] and hopefully fall asleep naturally. BUT sadly i think the only true solution will lie in not having to have 2 roommates and having to basically be on a sleep schedule that says "3 am is bedtime" I love my niggas to death [no homo] but I'm a natural loner and when the issue of sleep comes up I need to have my own space to hit the lights and be out whenever i please....I pray this all works out..SOON

pushing through

I personally know that I am not the best person there is. I constantly tell others "I'm a horrible person" The more I say this, the more I'm starting to believe it. There is no reason for the harsh, mean, sarcastic nature I have the majority of the time. It's a shame that I am like this and I actually want to offer a PUBLIC APOLOGY (and i HATE apologizing) to anyone, mainly ELENA, that I may have offended in the past.

To you baby,
I hope we make it through our little storm and that it is only an april shower and not an august hurricane. I know I can do better by you and that is truly my goal in these last 36 days on campus together. Thank you so much for staying with me and putting up with all the bullshit I throw out, my nonchalant attitude, and my questionable behavior when it comes to getting attention. Know that I fully love you and if I didn't I wouldn't still be here and do what I do for you.

Love,
Lil Charlie [insider]

SelfControl

I see you there...
Sitting in all of the marvelous beauty
you've been blessed to possess
i want nothing more than to....
slowly...caress you
tenderly...touch you
& emotionally feel you
but i know i can't....

now, "IT" kicks in
knowing where to go
when to stop
what to touch
and what i cannot
it hurts so bad
but know
it's only for good
without "IT"
opportunities never end
possibilities are boundless
and pleasure is possible that
has yet to be seen

Thus, i must have it
to protect the sanctity of this
to make this bond tighter
to, to show i TRULY care

SelfControl...be my guide and my crystal stair

givelife

So, i thought I would share with everyone again my wonderful message from church. This one didn't come from CAU chapel but instead from an amazing place called 12Stone. I went with 2 of my best friends [Alex & French] and I must say it was a great, inspiring, life-altering message....Enjoy and take something away from it

Cats aren't clean, just covered with cat spit.
Women and cats will do as they please. Men and dogs should just relax and let them.

Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Play as if you know the ending to the game.
Remember why we're here and what we're called to do. Death has been swallowed up in victory.

A full life comes in you pouring OUT to others. Water flow is the picture of a full life. We have to pour out so the father can pour in.

Pattern 4 pouring out:
1. Give gratitude to God

2. Pause for outsiders

3. Serve insiders (a church gets full life when everyone serves)

4. Go out of your way to serve others

No More Breakdowns....Just BREAKTHOUGHS

I just thought I'd share the wonderful message I received at CAU Chapel Sunday....ENJOY :D

Easter is an experience, a lifestyle.

There are times in ur life u don't feel the presence of god; when things become an illusion. We need a God who's real & meets us where we are.

If we need the breakthrough we're gonna need to hold on to the discussion of hope. Hold on to hope. W/o hope we are perishing

Without hope there is no faith, without faith we are no pleasing God.

You've got to have the word of God. "If you continue my word then u are my disciples indeed and then you will know the truth". (And the truth will set you free)

Its important to have friends that say I love you, but you're doin wrong.

None of us make it until all of us make it. If we don't make it through christ we won't make it.

All Jesus needs in an invitation. The holy spirit will not force himself upon you.

Graces = god's riches at god's expense
Jesus plans to prosper you and not to harm you.
I will trust you with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding.

(Refer to the chorus of "Stomp")

Hopefully these words will be beneficial to another person!

...alone

i wish to be...alone
in a place of comfort
a place of peace
solace, truth, calm

how can i get here?
someone show me the way
i don't think another can bring it to me
they simply can't
only I
will be able to bring
this non attainable destination
into my frugal reality

i long for it
crave it
i desire it
NEED it
oh Lord, may I?

i beg, grovel, succumb to you
if it will be mine
now, later, or anytime
before i die

Lord, please
let me, your servant
be
...alone

B-more's finest

While reading through some of my fave blogs i came across miss Parris Desiree's. She's a fellow rep of the DMV and one friend i've had since august. You can always count on parris for a cute outfit and a good hug. Make sure you give her blog a read and you won't be dissapointed

http://trestresdoux.blogspot.com/

CUATRO!

to think, it all started with an innocent walk to publix when i thought i didnt have a chance and she was actually diggin my friend...but now it has eclipsed 20 weeks or 140 days or better yet FOUR MONTHS. i know people may say "hey, its only 4 months.." but for me you must cherish things in life as they come because you never know how long they'll be there. [quote it, lol] i have learned to truly love this young lady for all of our differences and similarites, i can truly say that this is real love and its "maddd" strong [insider] hopefully these 4 months will be a blip in the rear view mirror as we continue on a path to where i can't see the end in sight

11.16.08

True Religion

have you ever admired something for so long, and then had the chance to grasp it in your arms??? well, i finally got that chance last saturday when the true religion outlet called my name. I have always LOVED the jeans as I saw people around town wearing them. Being a jean freak [owing 30 pair and having to give away 23 last year] i can value the quality denim, beautiful stitching, and superb washes. not to mention that best fit out. The way they hug up top and kinda fall at the bottom makes me :D. so when i tried my first pair on there was no way i was leaving VA without a pair...It just so happens that i fell in love so much, i had to buy 2 and it was the best $$ i spent in a long time. now i know i'll have 2 pair of jeans for at least the next 3-4 years that will always be stylish and not go out of style